Headline from the Grocery Store

LATE!

I'm rushing, rushing, rushing this TGIF edition!

I shouldn't have done it --- booked too many actrivities on a Thursday. But I had no choice. They were all pretty important. In retrospect, I should have worked on this edition a few days earlier. Oh well ... my apologies.

Anyway, I see the clock is already past midnight PST (which is when I normally launch this email). So rather than keep you guys (yes, there are quite a few of you out there who literally wait for this to reach your email boxes right around 12:00 am PST) holding your breath a little longer. I'm just gonna finish this off without proofing and without any other editing.

Just remember that I usually make post production corrections and the link at the very top of this email brings you to the original website. Or you could go to TravelingBoy.com and find it in one of their blogs a day or two later.

I hope you like the collection. Remember, I don't make money out of this. I just do this to brighten up your week and to congratulate you for being a productive member of society.

Please pass this around.

It's 12:38 a.m.

See you next week! TGIF!

Wisdom from Naomi of N. Hollywood, CA

Newspaper Headline
Contributed by Rey of Simi Valley. CA

Latest News: 49 mins ago

	Tired of constantly being broke and stuck in an unhappy marriage, a young husband decided to solve both problems by taking out a large insurance policy on his wife with himself as the beneficiary and then arranging to have her killed. A 'friend of a friend' put him in touch with a nefarious dark-side underworld figure who went by the name of 'Artie.' Artie explained to the husband that his going price for snuffing out a spouse was $10,000.
The Husband said he was willing to pay that amount but that he wouldn't have any cash on hand until he could collect his wife's insurance money. Artie insisted on being paid at least something up front, so the man opened his wallet, displaying the single dollar coin that rested inside Artie sighed, rolled his eyes and reluctantly agreed to accept the dollar as down payment for the dirty deed.

A few days later, Artie followed the man's wife to the local Costco Supermarket. There, he surprised her in the produce department and proceeded to strangle her with his gloved hands.

As the poor unsuspecting woman drew her last breath and slumped to the floor, the manager of the produce department stumbled unexpectedly onto the murder scene. Unwilling to leave any living witnesses behind, ol' Artie had no choice but to strangle the produce manager as well.

However, unknown to Artie, the entire proceedings were captured by the hidden security cameras and observed by the shop's security guard, who immediately called the police. Artie was caught and arrested before he could even leave the premises.

Under intense questioning at the police station, Artie revealed the whole sordid plan, including his unusual financial arrangements with the hapless husband who was also quickly arrested.

The next day in the Newspaper, the headline declared...

"ARTIE CHOKES 2 for $1.00 @ Costco"

Police Analysis
Contributed by Tom of Pasadena. CA

Police work is known for the need of instant and decisive action by officers. However, there are those rare occasions when holding back and allowing the incident to play out, while seeking guidance from a superior, might be better. Below is a good example:

Two policemen (Constable Ken and Bob) call the station on the radio.

"Hello. Is this the Sarge?"

"Yes?"

"We have a case here. A woman has shot her husband for stepping on the floor she had just mopped clean."

"Have you arrested the woman?"

"No sir. The floor is still wet."

Frustration
Contributed by Tom of Pasadena. CA

Frustration is looking for your glasses ... without your glasses.

Videos of the week:

Why Do Birds Have Stupid Walks?
Contributed by Mike of New York

I was laughing out loud with this video. Not only was it funny but it seemed to make total sense.

Fast Chevy
Contributed by Mike of New York

The speedometer doesn't register anything below 40mph - maybe that's a clue. At 1244 hp, it's more powerful than the Bugatti Veyron Super Sport. So fasten your seat belts when you drive this Chevy Corvette powered Hennessey Venom GT. You don't shift into fourth gear until 160 MPH! But I do wonder where you would be able to drive this.

20 Terrifying Two-Sentence Stories
Contributed by Blondie of New Jersey

It isn't Halloween but I thought this was unique and well written. It's not a video but a website that contains 20 blurbs that could well be captions in a Horror Movie. Who knows? Maybe one of these sentences will actually be the start of a Hollywood movide.

Smart Use of Ketchup Cup
Contributed by Charlie of New York

Charlie follows this Russian "everyday material" genius. This one teaches you a way to show off your environmental friendliness (is that a word?) the next time you visit McDonald's.

Sign Language Between Animal and Human
Contributed by Charlie of New York

I don't want to play with your political views so at the outset, I'm letting you know that this is a video about saving the environment. Beyond that, I thought this ability for animals to communicate in such a profound level was unbelievable. Is this for real?

Monkey Teaches Humans
Contributed by Charlie of New York

You've heard of Pavlov's Dog, right? Well, this experiment was training monkeys one thing but the monkeys quickly turned the tables around and they taught the scientists something else.

Introducing Spot the Robot
Contributed by Mike of New York

We end today's run with a fascinating robot. Wouldn't this be a perfect prop for a sci-fi horror movie? TGIF people!