Circus Duck

A duck walks into a pub and orders a pint of beer and a ham sandwich.

The bartender looks at him and says, "Hang on! You're a duck."

Philippines

I'm still in the Philippines. If you've never been to the Philippines, here are a few bullet descriptions:

Happy New Year!

I'm in Manila Philippines right now. Mixing family, friends and a little business.
Welcome to the War Zone! They celebrate New Year very differently here.

Merry Christmas!

Did you miss me last Friday? I'm sorry I could not send out my TGIF mail a week ago. I was still in Nigeria and there was no internet connection in the village I was in.

False Teeth

A dinner speaker was in such a hurry to get to his engagement that when she arrived and sat down at the head table, she suddenly realized that she had forgotten her false teeth. Turning to the man next to him she said, "I forgot my teeth."

Perfect Marriage

There is a story told about two old friends who were catching up:
One friend asked: “How is it that you haven’t yet married?”

Letter from Mom

Dear Son
Your Pa has a good job now, the first one in 48 years. We are a great deal better off than we were.

Pig Story

A farmer had 5 female pigs.
Times were hard, so he decided to take them to the county fair and sell them.

Computer Dependency

Here is the proof that we have become too dependent on our computers:
Question: Are you Male or Female?

Bubba Applies for a Job

Bubba applied for an engineering position at a Lake Charles refinery. A Yankee applied for the same job and both applicants having the same qualifications were asked to take a test by the manager.

A Day Without Sunshine

A day without sunshine is like...

Senior Halloween

You know you are too old to Trick or Treat when :
10. You get winded from knocking on the door...

A Boy's Prayer

"Lord, if you can't make me a better boy, don't worry about it ...
I'm having a real good time just as I am!"

Jewish Moms

MONA LISA'S JEWISH MOTHER :
"After all the money your father and I spent on braces, this you call a smile?"

Texas Poll

The latest telephone poll directed by Rick Perry, asked whether people who live in Texas think illegal immigration is a serious problem.

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