Why We Love Kids

A little girl asked her mother, "Can I go outside and play with the boys?"
Her mother replied, "No, you can't play with the boys, they're too rough."

Going to the Jim

One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift.
The next year, I didn't buy her a gift.

Pitiful Husbands

Butch the Rooster

Sarah was in the fertilized egg business. She had several hundred young pullets and ten roosters to fertilize the eggs. She kept records and any rooster not performing went into the soup pot and was replaced.

Tonsilectomy vs. Circumcision

Two little boys are in the hospital prior to having their operations.
One boy leans over and asks. "What are you having done?"
The second boy says. "I'm getting my tonsils out and I'm afraid."

Walk With Me

I hope this poem has the same effect on you as it did on me - then my forwarding it will be worth the effort.

Fisherman's Funeral

A funeral procession pulled into a cemetery. Several carloads of family members followed a black truck towing a boat with a coffin in it.

You're Weird

People say that you're weird,
if you talk to yourself.
They're wrong!

Engineer in Hell

One day, an engineer died and went to heaven. But St. Peter said, "I can't let you in because your name is not on the list."
So the engineer went down to Hell and was let in.

Chicken Roadkill

A man was riding his sportscar past a friend's chicken farm and he ran over one of the chickens and killed it.
When he got off the car, and looked at the chicken he recognized that this was his friend's prized chickens.

Sick Leave

I urgently needed a few days off work, but, I knew the Boss would not allow me to take leave. I thought that maybe if I acted 'Crazy' then he would tell me to take a few days off. So I hung upside-down on the ceiling and made funny noises.

Forbidden Dance

A Japanese couple were arguing about how to perform the Forbidden Dance of a Thousand Moons.

Where Have You Been?

I have been in many places, but I've never been in Kahoots. Apparently, you can't go alone. You have to be in Kahoots with someone.

Six Life Basics

Once all villagers decided to pray for rain, on the day of prayer all the people gathered but only one boy came with an umbrella.

Tour de France

Two Irishmen were sitting in a pub watching the Tour de France on TV."

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