Where’s The Marriage Instruction Book?

Heather Kobler

In order to get a driver license today, you need about 200 hours of driver’s training and most likely you will have watched hours of advice on what and what not to do while you are driving.  You probably would have had many hours of discussion and advice from parents and other adults who have been driving for decades and their advice is invaluable.  However, today we are going at Mach 5 and in a hurry to get to God knows where, and you need to fasten safety belts because it might be bumpy ride!

In the past people did things in some sort of order and seemed to be better prepare for living a life where material things had little or no meaning to them.  They took more time to find a life mate who had strengths to share and already knew how to take care of themselves.  They only bought (and paid for) items that they actually needed, not wanted.  My first “entertainment center” was several orange crates stacked up, and I was happy to have them.

Today, people who marry start out by having an expensive wedding that they can’t afford, a honeymoon that they can’t afford, an overpriced apartment filled with furniture they can’t afford (at 27% interest) and two car payments for up to 60 months that they can’t afford either! It’s no wonder people can’t make it to a second anniversary married or happy!  They are deep in debt and believe me, it’s hard to be in love when you can’t pay the bills.

If people lived on their own for at least one year, they would be better equipped to navigate life within a marriage.  Looking at many options before a purchase makes for a happier relationship and discussing a possible purchase BEFORE buying is highly recommended.

If your marriage is in trouble now and you believe having a child will solve your problems, STOP RIGHT THERE!  Adding responsibilities to a situation that is already in trouble just doesn’t work.  Being married for a few years is the best preparation for having children.  By then, you know each other and you should know if you want to take that step.  Being parents, is not for everyone.  If you think you might not like being a parent, you may be right.

Posted under: Heather

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