Submitted by RaoulTGIF on Sat, 04/23/2016 - 11:48
After the ninety-three year old lady finished her annual physical examination, the doctor said "You are in fine shape for you age, Mrs. Mallory, but tell me, do you still have intercourse?"
Submitted by RaoulTGIF on Sat, 04/16/2016 - 14:50
Ron Chester, 89 years of age, was stopped by the police around 2 a.m. and was asked where he was going at that time of night.
Submitted by RaoulTGIF on Sat, 02/27/2016 - 02:23
An atheist was walking through the woods.
'What majestic trees!'
'What powerful rivers!'
'What beautiful animals!' He said to himself.
Submitted by RaoulTGIF on Fri, 11/20/2015 - 16:24
A farmer had 5 female pigs.
Times were hard, so he decided to take them to the county fair and sell them.
Submitted by RaoulTGIF on Sat, 10/24/2015 - 00:51
You know you are too old to Trick or Treat when :
10. You get winded from knocking on the door...
Submitted by RaoulTGIF on Sat, 08/22/2015 - 07:05
I hope this poem has the same effect on you as it did on me - then my forwarding it will be worth the effort.
Submitted by RaoulTGIF on Fri, 07/03/2015 - 16:30
I have been in many places, but I've never been in Kahoots. Apparently, you can't go alone. You have to be in Kahoots with someone.
Submitted by RaoulTGIF on Sat, 06/06/2015 - 02:00
Morty visits Dr. Saul, the veterinarian, and says, "My dog has a problem."
Dr. Saul says, "So, tell me about the dog and the problem."
Submitted by RaoulTGIF on Sat, 05/09/2015 - 02:06
A Jewish grandma and her grandson are at the beach. He's playing in the water, she is standing on the shore not wanting to get her feet wet when all of a sudden, a huge wave appears from nowhere and crashes directly onto the spot where the boy is wading.
Submitted by RaoulTGIF on Fri, 02/06/2015 - 13:49
Dear Wife,
I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you forever. I've been a good man to you for seven years & I have nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been torture.
Submitted by RaoulTGIF on Fri, 01/23/2015 - 13:59
I've disconnected my home alarm system and de-registered from the Neighborhood Watch. I've got two Pakistani flags raised in the front yard, one at each corner, and the black flag of ISIS in the center.
Submitted by RaoulTGIF on Sat, 01/17/2015 - 14:31
What do we want?!!
Better Memory!!
When do we want it?!!
Submitted by RaoulTGIF on Sat, 01/10/2015 - 02:16
Another year has passed
And we're all a little older.
Last summer felt hotter
And winter seems colder.
Submitted by RaoulTGIF on Sat, 12/13/2014 - 02:49
A bookseller conducting a market survey asked a woman --- "which book has helped you most in your life?"
Submitted by RaoulTGIF on Fri, 10/10/2014 - 14:36
Giuseppe excitedly tells his mother he's fallen in love and that he is going to get married.
He says, "Just for fun, Mama, I'm going to bring over three women and you try and guess which one I'm going to marry." The mother agrees.
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