men and women

Women's Seminar

A group of women were at a seminar on how to live in a loving relationship with their husbands. The women were asked, "How many of you love your husband?"

Man Goes to a French Restaurant

A man goes into a restaurant and is seated. All the waitresses are gorgeous. A particularly voluptuous waitress wearing a very short skirt and legs that won't quit, came to his table and asked if he was ready to order, "What would you like, sir?”

How Men Think

As she sat by him, he whispered, his eyes full of tears….
"You know what?
You have been with me all through the bad times.
When I got fired, you were there to support me.

Vulner-Ability

The only cow in a small town in Northern Italy stopped giving milk. Then the town folk found they could buy a cow in Sicily quite cheaply. So, they brought the cow over from Sicily.

The Jewish Dog

Morty visits Dr. Saul, the veterinarian, and says, "My dog has a problem."
Dr. Saul says, "So, tell me about the dog and the problem."

Grounds for Divorce

A judge was interviewing a woman regarding her pending divorce and asked, "What are the grounds for your divorce?"

Cantaloupes and Algebra

(I don't usually use other artist's works but I had to make an exception with this one from the great Charles Schultz --- Raoul)

Missing

A husband goes to police station to file a "missing person" report for his wife.

Husband : I lost my wife, she went shopping & hasn't come back yet.
Inspector : What's her height?
Husband : I never checked.
Inspector : Slim or healthy?

Spoiling the Scotsman's Wife

My good lady and I walked past a swanky new restaurant last night.
"Did you smell that food?" she said, "it smelt incredible!"

Women Are Unique

Husband:
Honey, a car has hit me near the office. Paula brought me to the hospital. They have been making tests and taking X-rays. The blow to my head was very strong; fortunately it seems that did not cause any serious injury

Family Tree

A little girl asked her father,
"How did the human race start?"
The father answered,
"God made Adam and Eve and they had children, and so all mankind was made."



New Study

A new study has found that women with large backsides live longer than men who mention it.

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