Doctor Ka-Ching

Do you like your doctor? If you know me, you know that I don’t really care for my doctor, Dr. Ka-Ching. He treats me like a number. And I don’t blame him. I don’t take him seriously and so he doesn’t take me seriously. When I go to him I prepare a list of things that I feel needs attention. And he goes down that list like it’s the funny papers — the silliest things in the world: “Dry skin? Nah! Don’t worry about it! There’s always skin lotion. Thinning hair? That’s normal — you’re old! Pain in your back? Just exercise! .. take 2 of these and you’ll be fine in the morning … next patient!”

A lot of help he is, huh? The only time I think he is truly happy is when he discovers something wrong with me because it means he can recommend more pills or get more commission referring me to a specialist. He’s recommended pills and physical therapists — none of them I agreed with and never followed up with. So every time I come for a checkup I get this disappointed face because even though I didn’t follow his advice he sees that I am still healthy.

However, things were different last month. I told him I was feeling pain near my groin every time I tried to get up. Ka-ching! His eyes lit up. “Drop your pants! Cough! Aha! You have a hernia! You need a surgery. (Oboy!) They’ll have to cut you open, put a mesh, sew you back together. You’ll feel pain for a while (Yes!) and that’s it!” 

Maybe I was imagining it but he really seemed to relish my impending suffering. I know for sure he loved saying “you have no choice but to have surgery” — that echoed several times in my head. Checkmate! He got me!

So here I am, waiting for a few more appointments before the big “snip snip” day. I’m not afraid of the operation. My biggest concern and regret is Dr. Ka-Ching having the last laugh. And if that’s my biggest worry, this shouldn’t be too bad.

TGIF people! I hope you take better care of your health. And if you feel sick, remember, I can always recommend my doctor. Not!

“I learned a long time ago that minor surgery is when they do the operation on someone else, not you!”
— Bill Walton

Joke of the Week

Thanks to Naomi of North Hollywood, CA for sending this joke.

Videos of the Week

Toothpick Man
Sent by Art of Sierra Madre, CA

Watch Jeanne Robertson, a masterful storyteller, who shares her encounter with a guy with a toothpick on his mouth.

We Made It!
Sent by Charlie of New Jersey

With so many safety regulations, you wonder how we survived when we were kids. Think about it. Is the world getting more dangerous or are we just getting stupider? Where does personal responsibility and common sense kick in?

Don’s Puns

From Don’s collection of puns

Heavy Thought of the Week

Sent by Tom of Pasadena, CA

Parting Shot

Thanks to Don of Kelowna, B.C. who shared this.

The post Creation Retold appeared first on Traveling Archive.

The Gift

Time stood stilI at the top tier of the church risers last Saturday. Maybe it was the light glistening on the musical instruments. Or maybe it was the exuberance of the conductor. Whatever it was, I realized all this buzz was in preparation of the birth of one individual. For the uninformed, it must be a strange sight to watch grown ups behaving like kids waiting for their Christmas presents. This day of Jesus’ birth was planned way ahead in eternity past. Philosophers kinda knew it was coming but only God knew the details of His master plan. Who woulda thunk the backdrop of this central moment in global history would be a decrepit manger (translation: a stinky, shanty unfit for humans)? In a rare display of outright joy, God shared His excitement to the angels who burst into angelic music never before heard by human ears. The angels passed it on to lowly shepherds who went and visited the newborn babe. Mary and Joseph were prophesied that their child would be King. They must have seriously doubted the predictions when they looked at their pitiful surroundings. The visit of the shepherds and their story about the angelic orchestra must have given them the encouragement they needed.

I remember my excitement when my kids were born. I wanted to give my kids the best medical attention, the best everything … in contrast our all powerful God chose to give us the gift of His son wrapped in humble rags. No cigars, no champagne, no victory parade … just curious shepherd visitors.

(Isidro is a jobless drifter who had to hitch for his rides. For weeks I had been looking for an affordable bike to surprise him. The day before our practice, I bought Isidro a brand new bicycle. I was beaming with pride and excitement because Isidro had no clue what I had saved for him at the back of my car. Imagine my heartbreak when he said he didn’t want it.  He said it was too small, too impractical … I was crushed. Isidro’s pride prevented my joy.)

When the child Jesus grew up, few realized HE was God’s gift. They treated Him with disdain. They mocked Him … they killed Him. They rejected God’s gift. Mine was just a bicycle. God’s was His most precious and only begotten son. Think about that for a while.

Time stood still in the choir because I realized that Christmas joy comes from an exchange. It’s in the giving and the receiving. Without that completed transaction, there is no joy. And when we remember the reason for the season and accept THE GIFT, there is joy overflowing. Love and joy come to you — and to you God’s blessings too.

Merry Christmas!

“For unto us a Child is born, Unto us a Son is given”   — Isaiah 9:6

TGIF people!

Joke of the Week

Christmas Parking

Shared by Tom of Pasadena, CA

Videos of the Week

Jeanne Robertson: Left Brain Christmas Gifts
Sent by Art of Sierra Madre, CA

Shopping cheap and shopping practical.

Jingle Bells in Bowls
Sent by Charlie of New Jersey

This Asian uses bowls like a xylophone. He’s a pretty happy camper.

WATCH VIDEO

The Chinese Recorded Jesus’ Birth, Death and Resurrection
Sent Art of Sierra Madre, CA

WARNING: RELIGIOUS/POLITICAL video: Skip if this bothers you

The film quality is poor but this is a compelling historical evidence attesting to the validity of the life of Jesus. These are not religious but historical documents. There really was this man who performed all of these amazing miracles.

WATCH VIDEO

Don’s Puns

From Don’s collection of puns

Heavy Thought of the Week

Sent by Naomi of North Hollywood, CA

Parting Shot

Thanks to Tom of Pasadena, CA who shared this photo

Hey, do me a favor. Get your copy of the brand new Traveling Boy Joke Book. It’s pocket size and is perfect for a stocking stuffer. It’s about $10 only, unique and … ideal for your office mate or business friend.

The post Christmas Parking appeared first on Traveling Archive.