You can surmise from the title that there is a new occupant in our humble abode. Let me establish that I’m not in favor of this permanent visitor. Bloomer is a white Siamese-mix of a cat. This is my wife and my daughter’s idea. Before you accuse me of being an animal hater, let me tell you about our dog.

If you’ve been a subscriber for over 5 years you know about Zoe, our Shi Tzu who I christened “The Dog Who Would Never Die” because she overcame death several times. I never approved of Zoe. But the kids wanted a dog and my wife joined their chorus and their coup to win by majority vote. After a week or so, when the initial cuteness waned, the responsibility of feeding her and bringing her to the vet was thrown to me (as I predicted). What made it even worse was I was the one who was tasked to put him to sleep.

For years they said I shouldn’t feed her human food. But that’s what I fed her because she liked it. She should have died with the diet I gave her but somehow she survived for over 12 years. But one time, Zoe’s fur blocked the passageway of his poop and after crying in pain all evening, the next day I drove her to the Vet for Zoe to be put to sleep. I’m the guy who didn’t want a dog yet I’m the one who had to do the dirty execution alone. Those cowards! On our way,  I remember very clearly Zoe sitting at the passenger seat and staring at me with his teary puppy eyes and whimpering in pain. On the radio a song played “Faithful Friend” by Twila Paris — I kid you not! When I listened to the words, I broke down and cried like a baby. How embarrassing. A few minutes later, I remember the conversation with the Vet. I gave the Vet permission to put my “friend” to sleep. I cried again — in front of the Vet!!! The Vet said he was going to try and save Zoe’s life. Well, that’s what they all say. I left with a heavy cloud. I went home and my daughter hated me because I didn’t even give her an opportunity to say goodbye. The cloud expanded into a thunderstorm throughout the now quiet house.

And then, miracle of miracles! 2 days later, the Vet called and said, Zoe was alive! The Vet gave Zoe a special diet that somehow patched the wound and Zoe returned bald but wagging her tail. It was a joyous time.

Zoe has since passed away. The details are too painful and complicated to explain. The sadness hasn’t left me. And so when my wife said she wanted a cat or another dog, I vehemently refused. Heaven and earth may pass away — but my wife always gets her way. Bloomer arrived when I wasn’t home.

It’s been over a week now and I still have refused to look at The Cat straight in the eye. I don’t even know if it’s a he or a she! I really don’t want to get attached but the darn CAT tries to charm me by sitting on my lap or wrapping around my legs. The worst is when she sleeps beside me. I fear this is going to be a losing battle. Like the Borgs … resistance is futile!

I know I will grow attached to that manipulative animal. I know I will outlive The Creature and I will mourn again. Hurt again. I have every right to be mad at my wife and my daughter. But (and this is a big BUT) when I see my wife doting over that THING, when she comes home excited to see the MONSTER  —- I realize I need to accept The Cat for my wife’s sake. It’s what husbands do. It’s what I do for the one that I love.

“I had been told that the training procedure with cats was difficult. It’s not. Mine had me trained in 2 days.”
— Bill Dana

TGIF people!

Romance

Shared by Don of Kelowna. B.C.

Laughing Babies and their Pets
Sent by Naomi of N Hollywood

If you can’t stand cuteness, don’t watch this. Infectious baby laughter and some very intelligent animals.

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Heartwarming Magic
Sent by Naomi of N Hollywood

Mixing warmth and magic is pretty unusual. Watch how he astounds and makes people cry.

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Teens and a Rotary Phone
Sent by Francesca of CA

Wanna feel really old? Watch these teens having a hard time figuring out how to use a rotary phone.

WATCH VIDEO

Don’s Puns

From Don’s collection of puns

Pun 1:

Pun 2:

There was the person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh.

No pun in ten did.

Parting Shot

Thanks to Naomi of North Hollywood who shared this photo

The post In the Mood appeared first on Traveling Archive.

It’s a NOTHING day! The sun never came out today. That’s quite unusual here in California. No one really spent any time outside because it drizzled all day. People went about their regularly scheduled meetings but essentially, NOTHING major happened. It was a NOTHING day.

What if NOTHING happened in the world one day? Imagine what the Prime Time Network News would sound like:

“Good evening, this is your 9 o’clock news. NOTHING happened at the Capital today … Hmmm … let’s go to our field reporter, Lois Blain, at the downtown Police Station. Lois?”

“Good evening Barry. Apparently NOTHING happened today so back to you.”

“Okay! We’ve just checked will all our other reporters and across the board, everyone agrees it was a NOTHING day! Everything’s safe and peaceful. This is Barry Cronkite signing off! Good night! Sleep tight. NOTHING to fear! NOTHING expected. NOTHING to be excited about. Today was a NOTHING Day.”

No hype. No silly commentaries. NOTHING news! How weird would that be?  Actually, how wonderful would that be?

We’re constantly bombarded by violence, scandals and other depressing news. There’s a lot more good news than bad. But it’s the bad that make the headlines. Did you know that it’s just a handful of people in the news department who determine what deserves coverage in the news? It’s their job to make the news interesting. They conjure up the hype. After all, who would watch the show if there wasn’t NOTHING to share? That’s why they have news fillers (which are not time sensitive) stashed away in case they run out of exciting news.

Knowing this fabricated hype, why do you want to be suckered into believing that things are in chaos every day? There is always the bright side. A day when NOTHING happens? That’s really good news!

Here’s my gift to you. Click on the image below and download the picture. You can print it out on a regular 8.5″ x 11″ bond paper. Whenever you feel down, look at this picture and remember, the days when NOTHING happened. God has been, God is, and God will always be — in control.

But this is just me.

“It’s all about finding the calm in the chaos.”
— Donna Karan

TGIF people!

Airhead Detective Exam

Contributed by Tom of Pasadena, CA
(From the TGIF vault)

A policeman was interrogating 3 airheads who were training to become detectives. To test their skills in recognizing a suspect, he shows the first airhead a picture for 5 second and then hides it.

“This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?”

The first airhead answers, “That’s easy, we’ll catch him fast because he only has one eye!”

The policeman says, “Well…uh…that’s because the picture shows his PROFILE.”

Slightly flustered by this ridiculous response, he flashes the picture for 5 seconds at the second airhead and asks her, “This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?”

The second airhead giggles, flips her hair and says, “Ha! He’d be too easy to catch because he only has one ear!”

The policeman angrily responds, “What’s the matter with you two?!? Of course only one eye and one ear are SHOWING because it’s a picture of his profile!! Is that the best answer you can come up with?”

Extremely frustrated at this point, he shows the picture to the third airhead and in a very testy voice asks, “This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?”

He quickly adds “…think hard before giving me a stupid answer.”

The airhead looks at the picture intently for a moment and says, “Hmmmm…the suspect wears contact lenses.”

The policeman is surprised and speechless because he really doesn’t know himself if the suspect wears contacts or not. “Well, that’s an interesting answer…wait here for a few minutes while I check his file and I’ll get back to you on that.”

He leaves the room and goes to his office, checks the suspect’s file in his computer, and comes back with a beaming smile on his face.

“Wow! I can’t believe it…it’s TRUE! The suspect does in fact wear contact lenses. Good work! How were you able to make such an astute observation?”

“That’s easy,” the airhead replied. “He CAN’T WEAR regular glasses because HE ONLY HAS ONE EAR and ONE EYE!”

TGIF Videos

Babies Taste Lemon for the First Time
Sent by Leo of the Philippines

You can really taste that lemon when you see their faces. Even now as I type this there’s a tingling from my mouth to my heart. Weird!

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Malawi Comedian in Britain
Sent by Peter Paul of South Pasadena, CA

Politically Incorrect but who cares? If anyone else delivered these jokes, it wouldn’t be funny. This immigrant can find humor in subjects that would infuriate others.

Watch Video

Parting Shot

Thanks to Dom of Kelowna, B.C. who shared this photo

The post Airhead Detective Test appeared first on Traveling Archive.