Paradise on the floor
I was moved to Unit Three, which really did seem like paradise in comparison to Unit Two. We were given more freedom, plus there was a balcony overlooking LA Chinatown so we could breathe fresh air, demonstrating the freedom which was to eventually come.
The sleeping accommodations were the same as Unit Two. My new roommate was a Spanish language poet and singer, and he would entertain us in group conferences, where we were all invited to join in. Like most of the inmates, he was close to being released.
Yet, there was trouble in paradise with a bullying, tyrannical head nurse, Marcus, who would order us around and mock us as crazy loonies behind our back. When I noticed this, I would ask them why they were not creating a healthy environment, which was emotionally essential to return to freedom. He would laugh and shrug his shoulders. They were like underqualified highway patrol cops who would pull anyone over without question.
The inch high pillow was a problem. I asked him if could at least have a pillowcase. He threw one at me — “THAT SHOULD BE ENOUGH!” he said. At this point, I was only getting approximately three hours of sleep at night.
The head psychiatrist had informed both me and the rough head nurse, Marcus, that if I could not go back to sleep, I should approach the nurses’ station and ask for sleep medication. This was followed by a sandwich. It was a heavy dose of medication, and food was essential for digestion. The wrapped sandwich was thrown at me. At this point, I became too intimidated to remind him to bring me the required sandwich after each sleep medication..
Enough was enough
Just approaching the cruel nurse Marcus was all too much. I had a secret meeting with an alternative head nurse and social worker. I had a laundry list of insults, but what I had said was enough. My highly respected medical doctor (Dr. Hirshfeld) and Laura also changed the landscape in Unit Three — kindness, respect and professionalism was now required.
Marcus, the tyrannical nurse, was stripped of his power over me.
Freedom
I was released after ten days in the mental hospital. I thought I would a return to a relativity normal life as my wife drove me home, but I still struggle, trying to understand the difference between good vs. evil. I’m not certain of the status of the bullying Joshua. We still receive images of self-grandeur on a PTL app but nothing devoted to hurting Laura. Perhaps Laura’s family of siblings and in-laws really did step to the plate and strip him of his bullying power over others.
It was a long journey. I’m so glad to make it back outside. Now the healing continues.
POSTSCRIPT
Don’t be conflicted — just give! What I do wish is for everyone to understand is the plight of the mentally ill. Accept them as fellow human beings.
Once, when Pope Francis was in New York City, he wrote an op-ed in the New York Times. He wrote how every day we are approached by panhandlers and must make a moral decision if that person is worth a handout. Don’t be conflicted! Just give! And most importantly look the person in the eye and illustrate that you accept them as a fellow human being.
Movies to recommend.
- A Woman Under the Influence; John Cassavetes
- Tiitticut Follies: Fredrick Wiseman
- Shock Corridor: Samuel Fuller
- Let there Be Light: John Huston
- Lilith: Robert Rosen
End
