War of Words

Be safe, be healthy, and remember: Sometimes you just gotta laugh because only in America can a brat grow up to be President.  TGIF people!

Joke of the Week

Thanks to Chuck of Whittier, CA  for sharing this joke. WARNING: This may be offensive to some.

Video: Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing

Thanks to Don of Kelowna, B.C.
Let’s start our video with a refreshing version of an ancient hymn

Video: New Police Tool to Stop Car Chase

Thanks to Don of Kelowna, B.C.
Why didn’t I think of this? Simple and effective.

Video: Funny Free Kick Victim

Thanks to Choy of Quezon City, Philippines
This cracked me up.

Don’s Puns

Thanks to Don of Kelowna, B.C. who sent this pun.

Parting Shots

Thanks to Don of Kelowna, B.C.

Thanks to Peter Paul of South Pasadena, CA

One more from Peter Paul

The post Racing Tribe appeared first on Traveling Archive.

Name Game

My wife has been dreaming about owning a corgi (the dog with the perpetual smile) and she’s been experimenting with different names to call it. Her choices have transitioned from Piper, to Wolverine, to Goliath and now to Max. To her it’s so important. But I don’t get it. Po-TAY-toe … po-TAH-toe … it’s all the same to me … or is it? What’s really is in a name?

I’m starting to read the book of Joshua. In the intro it says his original name was Hoshea which means Salvation. This book was written maybe 4,000 years ago so I’m thinking: In all those years did Joshua really stand for salvation or did Joshua start the meaning of salvation?

When someone is called a Judas, a Hitler or an Einstein, the adjective (used to describe that person) is named after the original person’s achievement or failure.

Most people live and die with the name given to them from birth. It’s a name that the parents decreed for their child. Some names have significance to it — like people who are named after the parent’s favorite relative,  or because the child is supposed to carry the ancestry line, or named after the situation of their birth (as in Chief Raging Storm).

Which brings me to the point in all this: Do you like your name? Are you living up to your name? Whatever your name is, your achievements may be a positive or negative contribution to society. Will generations use your name in contemptuous expletives or will it mean something of honor?

Are you living up to your decreed path by your parents? Take your time and really ponder this. This mental exercise may show you a roadmap or a pattern that you have been following subconsciously all through your life.

Ask yourself this: If you had a choice, would you still take the path you are in? Or is this someone else’s path? If it’s a good path, great! I guess you should stay on course. But if “the shoe doesn’t fit …”, remember —  no one is forcing you to follow this path.

But of course, this is just me.

TGIF people!

Joke of the Week

Thanks to Peter Paul of S Pasadena, CA for sending this joke.

Don’s Puns

From Don’s collection of puns

Parting Shot

Thanks to Art of Sierra Madre, CA who shared this.

The post Stolen Speeding Car appeared first on Traveling Archive.

Blessings

I got a grateful phone call the other day. Rodger said he worked on a referral I had given him and was so excited and happy to be able to pay some of his bills. He was unusually upbeat and I shared his joy. And then he said something that I didn’t expect. He said “I’m giving you 20% commission for any referral you send my way.” To which I said, “No, this is God blessing you. Accept it all.”  He paused for a moment and continued to thank me.

If you know Rodger, he’s been having it rough for some time. He’s an honest, decent man but somehow people and circumstances have taken advantage of him. Few have treated him fairly. Most have said he did not meet their expectations. Compliments were few and far between. I’m guessing this is why he felt he needed to pay me, a good friend, for a kind deed. Dear God, take care of this beautiful man.

Did you grow up having to earn for every single reward? Sounds like many of us, huh? Many of us see strings attached to gifts. The give and take mentality has permeated society that when kindness is bestowed, we can’t even recognize it anymore. May I challenge you? Look around with a different lens. We are surrounded by so many blessings. I grew up with a weekly allowance worth 5 candies … that was enough then. What did you grow up with?

After counting all my blessings, for me, the most important blessing is the gift of salvation. You can’t buy it. You can’t earn it. It’s free. If you know what I’m talking about, you know you are blessed. If you don’t, I guess there’s a blessing waiting for you.

But this is just me.

TGIF people!

“Kindness is a gift everyone can afford to give.”
— Anonymous 

Joke of the Week

Thanks to Rodney of Manitoba, B.C. for sending this joke.

Thanks to Tom of Pasadena, CA who sent this newspaper clipping

Videos of the Week

Alexa for Seniors
Sent by Bruce of Kanub, Utah and Jeff of Pasadena, CA

Hey, I want one of these. I hope that I will still have a sense of humor when I reach that age.

Flying in Dubai
Sent by Tom of Pasadena, CA

A thrilling and dangerous exercise. One mistake and you’re done. High quality video.

Don’s Puns

From Don’s collection of puns

Heavy Thought of the Week

Sent by Rodney of Manitoba, B.C.

Parting Shots

Thanks to Garie of Makati, Philippines who shared this

Celebrating the Year of the pig:

The post Cooter Gets a Ticket appeared first on Traveling Archive.

A Tale of Two Cities

Last Saturday I found myself in the middle of a baby shower in Temple City. I was drawing 5 minute caricatures of well-to-do young families. In the process, I got into some very interesting intellectual conversations about career choices and family dynamics. I was being paid by the hour so I was very conscious of the speed I was churning these sketches up. They had fun and I had fun myself. The guests were pleasantly surprised at this unusual treat. The hostess was so proud and happy for her choice of entertainment that she displayed my work on her grand piano and said she was passing my name out to her other friends. I appreciate that.

In direct contrast of scenery, last month, I drew caricatures for the city of Watts [one of the poorest communities in Los Angeles]. To be honest, I was a bit nervous because as we approached the basketball court where I was to set up my easel, our guide pointed out 3 rival gangs to me. This was drive-by-shooting country (I wished I gave my wife a better goodbye when I headed out the door). I was only wearing my T-Shirt in the cold night air. The halogen lamps of the basketball court weren’t the best lighting but the “show had to go on.” The line was relentless. Many never had their portraits done … probably because they couldn’t afford it. They were shocked that I was doing it for free. One young black kid gave me business advice: “Are you rich? Like … do you live in an apartment? You know, [his inventive mind churning] you could make money drawing people for $5 a face.” How could you not love that boy?

I had to wrap up when the kitchen ran out of food. The church that sponsored the Christmas event fed 700 people. When I tried to get up a stabbing pain shot up my legs and backside. I guess I had sat down too long. I was so focused that I didn’t realize I was already shivering from the cold. I couldn’t walk. A good friend helped me to the car. I survived the night — no gun shot wound … but I was still wasted. That’s okay because my heart was full of gladness.

In my pain inside the car, I started to realize that one of these days, I would no longer be able to do face-to-face caricatures. My eyesight will go. My trembling fingers will no longer follow my instructions. My back will hurt so bad I wouldn’t be able to sit still for hours anymore.

I will surely miss doing this. I’ve done this for the dirt poor and the filthy rich. I’ve talked to thousands of strangers who I’ve connected quite intimately as I searched into their eyes for the brief period they were my portrait prisoners. Every one of them created by God so distinctly. Even twins have something different about them. Every one of them — special in God’s eyes. Every one of them loved by God. Maybe next week I will share what goes on my head as I draw people.

If you have a caricature I have made of you, please preserve it. If I get rich and famous, that drawing may cost a lot. If that happens, all these poor people like the citizens of Watts will own something of real value.

I decided long ago, pain or no pain, as long as I still can, I will share this gift of drawing to others. I’m certainly thankful if they pay me, but money should never be the determinant of what I give out freely. Please let others know of my services.

Tomorrow I will be doing caricatures at the Duarte Senior Center. It’s for charity. Do drop by and support the seniors. Perhaps you can still own an original Raoul.

TGIF people!

“The wise man does not lay up his own treasures. The more he gives to others, the more he has for his own. — Lao Tzu

Joke of the Week

Our Friday joke of the week comes from: Lois of Whittier, CA

Harry Caray was a beloved, colorful Major League sportscaster who was known for the funny stories he would tell about himself. I heard a story about him the other day, which would be much funnier if you could hear the teller of the story imitating Harry’s strange way of talking. It goes like this.

Lois

Video of the Week

Side by Side
Sent by Don of Kelowna, B.C.

This is probably the third time I am sharing this but it’s too good not to share again. Besides, there have been so many new subscribers since the last time.

Growing old can be funny.

Don’s Puns

From Don’s collection of puns

Heavy Thought of the Week

Sent by Rodney of Manitoba, B.C.

Parting Shots

Thanks to Don of Kelowna, B.C. who shared this

The post Caught Red Handed appeared first on Traveling Archive.

It’s a NOTHING day! The sun never came out today. That’s quite unusual here in California. No one really spent any time outside because it drizzled all day. People went about their regularly scheduled meetings but essentially, NOTHING major happened. It was a NOTHING day.

What if NOTHING happened in the world one day? Imagine what the Prime Time Network News would sound like:

“Good evening, this is your 9 o’clock news. NOTHING happened at the Capital today … Hmmm … let’s go to our field reporter, Lois Blain, at the downtown Police Station. Lois?”

“Good evening Barry. Apparently NOTHING happened today so back to you.”

“Okay! We’ve just checked will all our other reporters and across the board, everyone agrees it was a NOTHING day! Everything’s safe and peaceful. This is Barry Cronkite signing off! Good night! Sleep tight. NOTHING to fear! NOTHING expected. NOTHING to be excited about. Today was a NOTHING Day.”

No hype. No silly commentaries. NOTHING news! How weird would that be?  Actually, how wonderful would that be?

We’re constantly bombarded by violence, scandals and other depressing news. There’s a lot more good news than bad. But it’s the bad that make the headlines. Did you know that it’s just a handful of people in the news department who determine what deserves coverage in the news? It’s their job to make the news interesting. They conjure up the hype. After all, who would watch the show if there wasn’t NOTHING to share? That’s why they have news fillers (which are not time sensitive) stashed away in case they run out of exciting news.

Knowing this fabricated hype, why do you want to be suckered into believing that things are in chaos every day? There is always the bright side. A day when NOTHING happens? That’s really good news!

Here’s my gift to you. Click on the image below and download the picture. You can print it out on a regular 8.5″ x 11″ bond paper. Whenever you feel down, look at this picture and remember, the days when NOTHING happened. God has been, God is, and God will always be — in control.

But this is just me.

“It’s all about finding the calm in the chaos.”
— Donna Karan

TGIF people!

Airhead Detective Exam

Contributed by Tom of Pasadena, CA
(From the TGIF vault)

A policeman was interrogating 3 airheads who were training to become detectives. To test their skills in recognizing a suspect, he shows the first airhead a picture for 5 second and then hides it.

“This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?”

The first airhead answers, “That’s easy, we’ll catch him fast because he only has one eye!”

The policeman says, “Well…uh…that’s because the picture shows his PROFILE.”

Slightly flustered by this ridiculous response, he flashes the picture for 5 seconds at the second airhead and asks her, “This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?”

The second airhead giggles, flips her hair and says, “Ha! He’d be too easy to catch because he only has one ear!”

The policeman angrily responds, “What’s the matter with you two?!? Of course only one eye and one ear are SHOWING because it’s a picture of his profile!! Is that the best answer you can come up with?”

Extremely frustrated at this point, he shows the picture to the third airhead and in a very testy voice asks, “This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?”

He quickly adds “…think hard before giving me a stupid answer.”

The airhead looks at the picture intently for a moment and says, “Hmmmm…the suspect wears contact lenses.”

The policeman is surprised and speechless because he really doesn’t know himself if the suspect wears contacts or not. “Well, that’s an interesting answer…wait here for a few minutes while I check his file and I’ll get back to you on that.”

He leaves the room and goes to his office, checks the suspect’s file in his computer, and comes back with a beaming smile on his face.

“Wow! I can’t believe it…it’s TRUE! The suspect does in fact wear contact lenses. Good work! How were you able to make such an astute observation?”

“That’s easy,” the airhead replied. “He CAN’T WEAR regular glasses because HE ONLY HAS ONE EAR and ONE EYE!”

TGIF Videos

Babies Taste Lemon for the First Time
Sent by Leo of the Philippines

You can really taste that lemon when you see their faces. Even now as I type this there’s a tingling from my mouth to my heart. Weird!

Watch Video

Malawi Comedian in Britain
Sent by Peter Paul of South Pasadena, CA

Politically Incorrect but who cares? If anyone else delivered these jokes, it wouldn’t be funny. This immigrant can find humor in subjects that would infuriate others.

Watch Video

Parting Shot

Thanks to Dom of Kelowna, B.C. who shared this photo

The post Airhead Detective Test appeared first on Traveling Archive.

Last Wednesday was Valentine’s Day. Miraculously, I was able to pull it off again. My wife felt special and said she really enjoys Valentine’s Day because every year I manage to “hit it out of the ballpark.” She said that she can’t wait for next year’s surprise.

I don’t know if I should be glad or worried. You see, every year I try to come up with something unusual. Last year, I organized the men in our “Couples Group” to sing “Unforgettable” and read our Love Cards. The wives loved it and the men scored high that day. I don’t remember what I did the year prior to that but I do remember some of the others:

• One year I arranged for a traveling choir of women to sing her Love Songs at her place of work where she was the envy of her office mates
• Another year, when the kids were little, I woke her up in the middle of a chilly night, arranged for a babysitter and we had a warm breakfast of baked potato at a new all-night Wendy’s Hamburger chain
• Many years in a row before Pandora and Spotify, I would prepare audio CDs of her favorite music
• One of our very first Valentine’s evenings, we watched a movie dressed in the same shocking red and white collared T-shirts. Everyone was staring so we were so self conscious we ran to the parking lot to escape their chuckles.

Valentine’s Day Painting

Last Wednesday I posted a painting I had done that hangs in our bedroom. The painting was no surprise to her but it was a surprise for everyone else. She got so many likes and teasing from her Facebook (about 100) friends that she came home in very high spirits.

So here I am, post Valentine’s Day, and already fearing the next year. I should be so lucky, huh? I know she will appreciate whatever I give her … at least that’s what she says … but you know women — what they say and what they really mean can be entirely different. It’s “Clint Eastwood (aka Dirty Harry) time”— “Go ahead … make my day!” We all know she really wants me to do something even more special. That bar keeps getting more and more unreachable.

I’m a dead man walking.

So, how was your Valentine’s Day? Did YOU (men) “make her day?” Did YOUR MAN (women) make YOUR day?”

“The one thing we can never get enough of is LOVE. And the one thing we can never give enough of is LOVE.”
—  Henry Miller (Thanks to Nancy of Pasadena who sent this quote)

TGIF people!

February 16, 2018

Two Times

Contributed by Charlie of New Jersey

TGIF Videos

Illegal Immigrant Proposal in Subway
Sent by Charrie of Virginia

Someone tell me this guy’s just kidding. You single women out there, he’s a good catch! A proper slave!

WATCH VIDEO

Police Scared of Mouse
Sent by Art of Sierra Madre, CA

Here’s a quick video. Just gives you that confidence in our government issued protectors, doesn’t it?

WATCH VIDEO

Parting Shot

Thanks to Don of Kelowna, B.C. who shared this photo

Parting Shot 2

Thanks to Scott of Deerfield, New Hampshire who shared this photo

The footsteps that a child follows are usually the ones the parent thought they covered up.
— Anonymous

The post There Are Two Times Men Do Not Understand Women appeared first on Traveling Archive.

I have a load of stuff I still have to do before my trip to Nigeria. I leave Thanksgiving Day. As you enjoy your turkey I will probably be stuck in the airport.

Someone wondered why I was going to unfamiliar Nigeria instead of going back to my homeland. My reply is because the opportunity presented itself.

Why did Mother Theresa minister in India instead of her homeland? Why do missionaries go to far away lands instead of helping their own kind? Were they wrong? I don’t think so.

Sometimes one needs to change to a different location to start afresh — away from the the confines of the box that people put them in. This is very true for late bloomers like me. There is a statistic that says traveling increases not only the physical borders but also the borders of one’s imagination and potential. Even Christ preferred to perform miracles away from his birthplace of Nazareth.

Has life stagnated for you? Perhaps it’s time to travel and expand your mind. Be the better person you really are.

BTW, I am not sure if I will have internet access or time to prepare my TGIF emails for the next 3 weeks. I will miss you for sure. Be good! Happy Thanksgiving!

“Where does he get this wisdom and the power to do miracles?” Then they scoffed, “He’s just the carpenter’s son, and we know Mary, his mother, and his brothers — James, Joseph, Simon, and Judas. All his sisters live right here among us. Where did he learn all these things?” And they were deeply offended and refused to believe in him.

Then Jesus told them, “A prophet is honored everywhere except in his own hometown and among his own family.” And so he did only a few miracles there because of their unbelief.

— Matthew 13:54-58

TGIF people!

Senior Theater Seats

Contributed by Rick of Chino Hills, CA

An old man lay awkwardly sprawled across three entire seats in the movie theater.

When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the old man, “Sorry sir, but you’re only allowed one seat.”

The old man didn’t budge. The usher became more impatient.

“Sir, if you don’t get up from there I’m going to have to call the manager.”

Once again, the old man just muttered and did nothing.

The usher marched briskly back up the aisle, and in a moment returned with the manager.

Together the two of them tried repeatedly to move the old disheveled man, but with no success.

Finally they summoned the police.

The officer surveyed the situation briefly, then asked, “All right, buddy, what’s your name?”

“Fred,” the old man moaned.

“Where you from, Fred?” asked the police officer.

With a terrible strain in his voice, and without moving, Fred replied;
“The balcony.”

TGIF Videos

Parting Shot

Thanks to Don of Kelowna, B.C. who provided this photo

The post Theater Seats for a Senior appeared first on Traveling Archive.