I’m a travel writer. Words are what I do. My stories may not always sing but I usually can put one word in front of another succinctly enough to craft a quasi-well-written article. But when I heard about the newly opened Planet Word in Washington, D.C., I was so excited, I had no words.

My wife thinks I don't respect her privacy enough.

An old man lay awkwardly sprawled across three entire seats in the movie theater. When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the old man, "Sorry sir, but you're only allowed one seat."

You know you are too old to Trick or Treat when: 10. You get winded from knocking on the door 9. You have to have another kid chew the candy for you...