Hi Mark, This is Tom next door. I've got a confession to make. I've been riddled with guilt for a few months and have been trying to get the courage to tell you face-to-face.

Dear Family: I have made an important New Year's resolution. This is to inform you that I will not be able to afford an expensive nursing home which would allow me to die poor and very old.

I pulled into the crowded parking lot to do my Christmas shopping and rolled down the car windows to make sure my Labrador Retriever pup had fresh air. She was stretched full-out on the back seat and I wanted to impress upon her that she must remain there.

Jesus was wandering around Jerusalem when he decided that he really needed a new robe.

You never appreciate what you have till it's gone.

Ms. Terri asked he Sunday School class to draw pictures of their favorite Bible stories. She was puzzled by Katina's pictures...

Wife: It's the holiday season and I have a bag full of used clothing I'd like to donate. Husband: Why not just throw it in the trash? That's much easier.

A book titled "How to Change Your Wife in 30 Days" sold 2 million copies in one week. But the author discovered that the title had a spelling error.

At dawn the telephone rings, "Hello Señor Rod? This is Ernesto, the caretaker at your country house." "Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?"

Two brooms were hanging in the closet and after a while they got to know each other so well they decided to get married.