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Raoul’s Two Cents: July 22, 2022

Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow

So I’m thinking of shaving my head.

I was brushing my teeth in front of the mirror the other night and I saw this patch of skin at the back of my scalp glistening in the reflection. I knew my hair was thinning but I didn’t know I was losing that much hair. It was pathetic … reminded me of the Amazon Jungle suffering from years of deforestation.

Suddenly, I’m looking at hair-growing products, wigs, hair extensions, caps, vitamins, hair coloring, etc.. people actually believe those ads! Suckers! This hair business is a multi-billion dollar industry feeding on the vanity of people. “Dude,” I said to myself, “face the fact that you’re getting old. If a billionaire like Donald Trump cannot regrow his hair, what are your chances?”

Later, I’m looking at our living room and I see a clump of dog hair rolling down the wooden floor like hay balls in the desert. Talk about adding insult to injury. Our two corgis stare at me … snickering like they know I’m breaking the 11th Commandment — “Though shalt not covet thy dog’s hair.” I’m thinking that maybe I can invent a way to stick those dog hair to the human skull. The inspiration quickly dies when I envision Larry of the 3 Stooges with his wistful side hair.

I look up and ask God why He invented hair in the first place. I remember an anthropology article saying that hair was made to protect the skull — to soften the blows on the head while chasing dinosaurs. Hogwash! If that were true, please explain why some Westerners look like hairy gorillas and most Asians are hairless like the cats of nefarious criminals. Don’t tell me Westerners had more blows on their head. No, I think hair was created to gauge how many years are left in this old body. There comes a point in life when you’re bald and ugly, when you’re as old as me, when you have to accept that you are no longer the tall, dark, handsome, drop-dead gorgeous Adonis. Move over virile Tarzan. Hello pitiful Professor Xavier.

I decide to look at the bright side. I won’t have to spend for hair products anymore. I won’t have to comb my hair after I shower. When the wind blows, my hair won’t get messed up anymore. I wonder: do bald men have dandruff? Do they still go to a barber or do they just shave themselves? Will I need to start buying shoe polish?

How’s YOUR hair? Are you aging gracefully or are you searching for that wonder drug for the follicle challenged? Give up the fight, Dude. Come to the dark side … I mean the bright, shiny side! Accept the truth that you were never really beautiful to begin with. No one will notice the transition. Once you were ugly with lots of hair. Now you’ll be ugly without hair. Either way, you’ll still be ugly. Bwa ha ha ha ha!

Now that my hair is going, I’m beginning to notice my friends’ hair. Most have thin hair. Many have white hair. Many dye their hair. Others tie their hair into a bun to make sure the remaining strands hide their bald spots. The smart ones shaved — which is where I’m going. Mr. Clean, here I come!

TGIF people!

Raoul

“I knew I was getting bald when it was taking longer and longer to wash my face.”
— Harry Hill


Joke of the Week

Thanks to Art of Sierra Madre, CA for this joke.

Video of the Week

Thanks to Jacqueline of Pasadena, CA

I couldn’t find the English version of this video which
Jacqueline sent. But this is the reaction when the
passengers realize the pilot was working remotely.

Parting Shots

Thanks to Rodney of Manitoba, B.C.

Thanks to Tom of Pasadena, CA

I found these series of baby jokes to remind me of the days when I started growing hair.

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6 Comments

  1. Tom

    July 22, 2022 at 1:03 pm

    Thanks Raoul Great Selection Video on Air India was superb. Take Care and don’t worry about your hair. Tom

    Reply

  2. Heather

    July 22, 2022 at 1:03 pm

    I’ll still love you bald or not!

    Reply

  3. Lee

    July 22, 2022 at 1:04 pm

    Ouch! Now, since I am older than you, I am finally “old and ugly” but when I was in the 8th grade a fellow classmate told me “God, you are ugly!” So, the only difference is that I am not going to get better looking soon! Will my hair return in heaven? What age will I look like then? Oh my, the questions you raised you “old man”! EmojiEmoji

    Lee

    Reply

  4. Lee

    July 22, 2022 at 1:05 pm

    There are not many pretty or handsome people that are my age and those that are spent a lot of money on plastic surgery, dye, wigs, etc. etc. Like you, I do not want any heroic measures to keep me going when my time is up. I am ready and have thought what a blessing a good old fashion heart attack would be over months (years?) of assisted care in practical matters (bathroom, baths, etc. etc.). Most of us do not want to live that long when the quality of life is no longer present (making your own decisions and doing the practical things for ourselves and having a clear mind and mobility. There is a down side to cutting edge medical care, namely it keeps the body going longer than it should.

    Blessings to you as you enter this special time of life that has some blessings but also some “down sizes”

    *****
    I do look for ways to be a blessing and not a pain in the neck to younger folks. I have been blessed by some elder folks with words of wisdom when I needed it most. It was always given with grace and kindness with anxiousness to be a blessing and they were. That is what I look for these days. I am sure that this will be true for you as well.

    Lee

    Reply

  5. Chuck

    July 22, 2022 at 1:05 pm

    Happy Friday Raoul,

    Enjoyed your email. Laughed at your “hair observations”. One of my good friends Mike, a Puerto Rican, for years groomed his balding head spending much time combing and trying to cover his bald hair by placing strands of what was left of his hair across his head. Finally he gave up and just shaved it off! It was long enough ago so that his friends nick named him Kojak – Telly Savalas. happier and saved time in the mornings as well. “Who loves you baby?”. As Kojak used to say on the TV sitcom. But men don’t take what God gives them. They have to “Improve” on it. My favorite pathetic sight was Mayor Julianne doing a tv interview with black hair dye running down his sweaty face. As Jim Cary would say, “L” – Loser…”

    Really enjoyed the Baby Pictures. Much better than dogs and cats. Again as W.C. Fields would say, (See the online film of W.C. in The Barber), “Keep that little Cur away from me.” Bring on the babies! Adopt orphans not dogs and cats…

    Blessings,

    Great Grandpa Chuck

    Reply

  6. Rick

    July 28, 2022 at 8:13 am

    Shave it! 🪒

    If you change your mind it will always grow back to it’s current condition, but give yourself and family a chance to get used to it.

    I did that for years stating with a 3 and working down to a 0. Finally figured why am I paying for a buzz cut, and started shaving it myself. It still is maintenance twice a week, but at least I’m saving money and not driving to the Fantastic Sam’s
    three times per month.

    Enjoy!

    Reply

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