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Secret to a Happy Marriage

Raoul’s 2 Cents

Wedding Day

Someone’s getting married this weekend. You can bet preparations were made months in advance: reservations, RSVPs, plane fares, hotel reservations, food, etc. — all of these are culminating tomorrow.

I didn’t want to buy a suit but my wife said it was important. I didn’t want to buy new shoes but she said I needed to have a new shoes to go along with the new suit. Then she said I needed a new tie …

Oh, the things you need to wear when you go to a wedding. The practical man in me questions why a ton of time and money go to that one day event instead of saving for the future of the marriage. Women say they want a simple wedding. Guys, if your fiancee says she’s going for “simple” you ought to start saving like crazy because then you know she’s really going for the jugular! She’ll say she’s doing it for her Mom but you know that’s what Moms are for — they’re the designated scapegoat.

And what about the Dad? He’s the one you should really fear. He’s the designated Hit Man who makes sure there’s no room for the  groomto change his mind. Notice that Dads always sit between the groom and the exit door? You gotta study the logistics, man. No wonder grooms always get nervous — they see their lives (and their life savings) flash before them.

I’ve been practicing a song to sing for the reception for several months now and I still haven’t perfected the chords and the words. I’m gonna mess up for sure. See? Even I am getting nervous.

Good thoughts. I need to think good thoughts. I need to go to my “happy place.” Then I think of grand kids — those little adorable creatures that think the world of you just because you’re part of the family. And then I think of new relatives and I remember the sweet and caring whole kaboodle. I like them. Life’s gonna be different but “good” different. Everything will be fine. What a blessing.

Marriage was established by God in Genesis 3:23. Of course, there was no expensive fanfare. More like a “come-as-you-are” event. After being alone … busy naming the animals, Adam meets Eve for the first time and he is officially “twitterpated” — Wow! Hubba! hubba!  “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of man.”  

I don’t know about you but I believe most kids marry fixated that their spouse will be their ticket to a fairy tale life. But that kind of thinking only sets them up with  unrealistic expectations. Study the verse and it actually refers to a perfect partnership for an upcoming task. There is no guarantee that life will be problem-free from that point. Indeed, the opposite is more true. The exchange of vows is a statement that out of all the people in the world, they choose each other to face the challenges leading to a godly goal. You who have been married for a while, did you know about this? Would your marriage have been better if someone explained this to you? You who are in a serious relationship, is the person you’re in love with THE person (out of all the people in the world) who you want to face the battle of life with? Are you willing to serve? Is he/she willing to serve you? … to carry you during the tough times that are sure to come?

Of course, this is just me. TGIF people!

Once upon a time there was a boy who loved a girl, and her laughter was a question he wanted to spend his whole life answering.”
— Nicole Krauss

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Thanks to Ray of Burbank, CA for sending this joke.

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Thanks to Rodney of Manitoba, B.C. who shared this.

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  1. Tom

    May 29, 2019 at 4:09 pm

    I laughed through the whole issue. Reminded me of my Marriage 62 years ago. 8 AM mass then cookies and punch in my in laws back yard. Then setting off for our honeymoon not knowing you should have hotel reservations. What was a reservation? Finally a cramped room in an annex with noise of cars and people all night.

    You know looking back I wouldn’t change a thing. Old suit, comfy shoes, and a beautiful Bride I still love.
    Thanks for the reminder.

    Tom of Pasadena

    Good Luck with your song, I know you will do well!


  2. Art

    May 29, 2019 at 4:10 pm

    Amen to that Raoul!


  3. Heather

    May 29, 2019 at 4:10 pm

    Enjoyed your piece.


  4. Chuck

    May 29, 2019 at 4:11 pm

    Hello Raoul,

    Good Stuff! Two weeks ago we heard a wonderful and humorous sermons on marriage given by Pastor Mike Vincent at Capilla Calvario Rosarito, Baja CA. that I have ever heard. He makes lots of use of appropriate overhead slides to fit the situation. One set was a picture of what a fiancée expected of her future husband to be – Photo of a muscular Stallone – what she gets is a photo Richard Simons doing a goofy heel kick! The main point of his message was it is all a difference in communication and how God wired us. After some 58 years of being married to a beautiful wife I can’t tell anyone how important communication is. However, the one thing I would have liked to hear Pastor Mike say from the pulpit was for the young people in the congregation about sex. We all shy away from that topic. God created it, and it is good! But to be saved for marriage. What I heard and learned as a young boy was what we all learned in Junior High School – locker room talk but never from our parents or the church then. Kids know it’s good because they all talk about it – just in the wrong context.

    One memorable Ice Breaker – the first talk a new member delivers at Toastmasters, delivered by a new young member a few years ago, in his Ice Breaker talk said, that when he went for the first time to pick up his date, his now wife from her home, he had to walk up a long driveway to the house When he got to the house her dad was sitting on the front porch with a shotgun across his lap. No words were necessary! They’re happily married and he is a pastor.

    One character said that sex is a lot of work and very strenuous, if it wasn’t so good men wouldn’t have anything to do with it!

    Thanks for your TGIF,

    (:>}) – Chuck


  5. John

    May 29, 2019 at 4:12 pm

    Good thoughts on marriage Raoul…..and rather timely! Hope you and wife are having a wonderful time! And I wish the happy couple all the best in the world and to take God with them in their new married life.


  6. Susan

    May 29, 2019 at 4:12 pm

    Hi Raoul,
    Congratulations! It seems like it’s one of your kids getting married.
    Anyway, I would like to thank you for this issue and also would like to request permission if I can use some of your jokes about marriage as we are conducting a couples’ retreat in June.
    Please let me know if we can use them.
    Thanks so much and God bless!


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