I have been studying one of the least favorite books of the Bible: The book of Chronicles. C’mon, be honest. Even if you say you’ve been a Bible thumper for years, you kinda skip Chronicles dontcha? Can’t say I blame you --- pages and pages of difficult names to pronounce. Picture this: a Jewish Mom calling her kids for dinner: “Almodad, Sheleph, Hazarmaveth, Jerah, Hadoram, Uzal, Diklah, Obal, Abimael, Sheba, Ophir, Havilah, Jobab – dinner time!” And just imagine her calling them by their middle name when she’s really mad.

My life flashed before me (in a good way) last night. I picked up my old dusty Bible that my wife gifted to me back in 1995 as a Father's Day present. I had put it aside for several years because the book binding had given up on the pages and the wrinkled sheets kept on falling off. I'm one of those who abuse books --- I underline, write notes and even draw pictures (lots of them because I'm a visual learner) on the margins and in between columns. Reading my desecrated notes, I was impressed at the insights from my "quiet time" and the many teachers that passed on their scriptural wisdom to me. What a joy! What a treasure! Many of my notes were written when my kids were still under 10 years old. I carried that Bible as well as the many milk bottles and toys we had to drag along whenever we went out. No wonder it got beat up.

It was Christmas and the judge was in a merry mood as she asked the prisoner, "What are you charged with?"

If you see a fat man... Who's jolly and cute, wearing a beard and a red flannel suit, and if he is chuckling and laughing away, while flying around in a miniature sleigh with eight tiny reindeer to pull him along...

My wife asked me to stop singing "I'm a Believer" by the Monkees because she found it annoying. At first I thought she was kidding.

Interviewer: "So tell me about yourself."

A photon walks into a hotel. The desk clerk says, "Can we help you with your luggage?"

Benjamin listened intently as Rabbi Greenbaum read from the Bible. "May I ask a question?" Ben asked.

Pharmacist to a customer: "Sir, please understand, to buy an anti-depression pill you need a proper prescription."

Differences 40 years can make...