A commander walks into a bar and orders everyone around.

"Dad are we pyromaniacs?" "Yes, we arson."

"Dear wife, thanks for making my life wonderful, you are my angel, thanks for making me worth living! You are great and wonderful."

A man and his wife walks into a dentist's office. The man says to the dentist, "Doc, I'm in one heck of a hurry. I have two buddies sitting out in my car waiting for us to go play golf, so forget about the anaesthetic. I don't have time for the gums to get numb."

An old Native American man goes to his local bank to borrow $500.

A duck walks into a bar and says, "Do you have duck food here?"

A young Native American woman wen to a doctor for her first-ever physical exam.

The Courthouse Security Officer was showing a group of ninth-graders around. Court was in recess and only the clerk and a young man in custody wearing handcuffs were in the courtroom.

A woman walks into a bar with his dog. "This is a talking dog. If this dog can answer my questions, who will buy me a drink?" she asks.

An inventor wrote that: I went to the NZ Patent Office trying to register some of my inventions. I went to the main desk to sign in and the woman at the desk had a form that had to be filled out.