Paraprosdokians

Stressful Day

   This has gotta be one of the busiest Thursdays for me as I prepare this TGIF edition. It was one meeting after the other, one technical support after the other, one phone call after the other, one customer request after the other, one program crash after the other .... I'm surprised I can even laugh at myself. This is beyond multi-tasking. I should be frustrated but I'm not. At the end of the day I think back at all I had accomplished and I have to smile. My only regret is that I had to skip a church event.

   After I finish this TGIF, I am cooking a surprise dinner for my wife --- steamed Salmon Head which I bought after my afternoon meeting. I know when she comes home she will be tired preparing for tomorrow's event. The yummy dinner will be good for her. Tonight we are both driving to Riverside (some 50 miles away) to prepare for my wife's business retreat in the morning.

   Honestly, don't we live crazy lives? And some days are crazier than others. But there should be joy amidst the stress because this should remind us that we are needed.

   Stress is always an option ... but so is joy that we are able and blessed with responsibilities.

TGIF people!

Wisdom from Joji of Antipolo, PhilippinesWords of Wisdom

You know that little thing inside your head that keeps you from saying things you shouldn't?
Yeah, I don't have one of those.

Thanks to this week's winners:
Charlie of New Jersey, Tom of Pasadena, Naomi of N Hollywood and Joji of Antipolo.



You can view this email
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"It's not stress that kills us,
it is our reaction to it”

--- Hans Selye

Paraprosdokians
Contributed by Tom of Pasadena, CA

A paraprosdokian is a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence is unexpected.

If I had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive, they'd eventually find me attractive.



I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom, until they're flashing behind you.

Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool, so I gave him a glass of water.

Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.


I'm great at multi-tasking--I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.

If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

Take my advice ... I'm certainly not using it.

My wife and I were happy for twenty years; then we met.

Hospitality is the art of making guests feel like they're at home when you wish they were.

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

Ever stop to think and forget to start again?

Women spend more time wondering what men are thinking than men spend thinking.


He who laughs last thinks slowest.

Is it wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly?

I was going to give him a nasty look, but he already had one.

Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

I was going to wear my camouflage shirt today, but I couldn't find it.

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

If tomatoes are technically a fruit, is ketchup a smoothie?


Confucious Say
Contributed by Naomi of North Hollywood, CA

Confucius Say: It's OK to let a fool kiss you;
but don't let a kiss fool you.

Confucius Say: A kiss is just shopping upstairs
for downstairs merchandise.

Confucius Say: It is better to lose a lover
than love a loser.


Videos of the week:

Talking Grocery Food
Contributor:
Tom of Pasadena, CA

Grocery Store Prank Sausage

Funny food. Funny reactions. A fun video.

Child Prodigies Sing MJ's Heal the World
Contributor:
Charlie of New Jersey

Heal The World Kids

I think I like this version better than the original.

Star Wars Medley from Jimmy Fallon
Contributor:
Charlie of New Jersey

Star Wars Jimmy Falon

Star Wars Fans, here's a real treat.

TGIF people!

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