Sell Your Golf Clubs

SURVIVOR

I'm embarrassed to admit this but I'm watching old episodes of Survivor. I only watched the very first episode and then I didn't want to get hooked on it again. I didn't even know it was still running. Is it? To my pleasant surprise, a few of the seasons are available online. The beauty about watching it this time around is there is no waiting for next week's episode.

I don't know. Maybe I just love seeing desperate people go at each other's throats. It's Reality TV at it's awful best.

Beyond the tragic faces of the spoiled contestants, there is the beauty of the untapped wildreness.

We humans are funny. No matter how compassionate we think we are, we still relish seeing people struggle to the death. We enjoy the twists and turns as human drama unfolds ... seeing alliances fray at the seams when opportunity knocks.

I don't have any earth-shattering message to share today. Except maybe that I'm just like you. We've all got our guilty pleasures ... warts and wrinkles. Some of us are better at hiding them. Some of us have learned to overcome them. And some of us ... don't really think about it ... some just go with the flow.

Wisdom from Naomi of N. Hollywood, CA

Sell Your Golf Clubs
Contributed by Don of Kelowna, B.C.

Jerry decided to tie the knot with his long time girlfriend. One evening, after the honeymoon, he was cleaning his golf shoes. His wife was standing there watching him. After a long period of silence she finally speaks.

	"Honey, I've been thinking, now that we are married I think it's time you quit golfing. Maybe you should sell your golf clubs." Jerry gets this horrified look on his face.
	She says, "Darling, what's wrong?" ”For a minute there you were sounding like my ex-wife.”

"Ex wife!?!?!" she screams, "I didn't know you were married before!"

”I wasn't!“

Ooooooooo!

Engineer's Conversion Table
Contributed by Alan of Pasadena. CA

1. Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter = Eskimo Pi
2. 2000 pounds of Chinese soup = Won ton
3. 1 millionth of a mouthwash = 1 microscope
4. Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement = 1 bananosecond





5. Weight an evangelist carries with God = 1 billigram
6. Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour = Knotfurlong
7. 16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone = 1 Rod Serling



8. Half of a large intestine = 1 semicolon
9. 1,000,000 aches = 1 megahurtz
   

   

10. Basic unit of laryngitis = 1 hoarsepower
11. Shortest distance between two jokes = A straight line
12. 453.6 graham crackers = 1 pound cake
13. 1 million-million microphones = 1 megaphone
14. 2 million bicycles = 2 megacycles
15. 365.25 days = 1 unicycle
16. 2000 mockingbirds = 2 kilomockingbirds



17. 52 cards = 1 decacards
18. 1 kilogram of falling figs = 1 FigNewton
19. 1000 milliliters of wet socks = 1 literhosen
20. 1 millionth of a fish = 1 microfiche



21. 1 trillion pins = 1 terrapin
22. 10 rations = 1 decoration
23. 100 rations = 1 C-ration
24. 2 monograms = 1 diagram
25. 4 nickels = 2 paradigms
26. 2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University
    Hospital = 1 IV League
27. 100 Senators = Not 1 decision

Videos of the week:

An App for protection
Contributed by Tom of Pasadena, CA

Pretty handy app in times of trouble.

The Meta Picture
Contributed by Jody of Silverlake, Los Angeles, CA

Jody said this website would appeal to both my inner artist and humorist. She was right.

Bob Hope Christmas with the Troops
Contributed by Rodney of Manitoba, B.C.

Bob Hope left us on July 27, 2003 yet his memory lives on especially in the hearts of the US troops he visited every Christmas. I used to work in Burbank in the Toluca Lake area and during lunch breaks my officemates would tour me around Bob's neighborhood. The walls of his mansion were covered with vines.

Andre Rieu with 3 Year Old Violinist
Contributed by Ernie of New York

This is a long but entertaining video. Hey, I know some of you have all the time in the world and watch every single post I send every Friday. This kid has the makings of a star. Here he is at 5 years old.

Golf Fail Compilation
Contributed by Tom of Pasadena, CA

Why oh why do people insist on playing this dangerous game? There are days when I wish I could play this expensive escape but when I see videos like this, I am content just where I am.

Bullet vs. Water Balloons
Contributed by Art of Pasadena, CA

Okay, time for some science. How many water balloons does it take to stop a bullet? The answer is between 1 and 10. This is not a trick question. Understanding the velocity of a fired bullet and the density of a water balloon, how many balloons will it go through? I love the slow motion. FYI, I guessed too many.

Selfie Shoes
Contributed by Mike of New York

This was an April Fool's Joke but I wasn't sure when I got it the first time. SIlly me. TGIF people!