Clever
Word Usage An Oldie but Goldie sent in by Tom of Pasadena, CA
A man's home is his
castle, in a manor of speaking

Dijon vu – the same
mustard as before
Practice safe eating
– always use condiments
Shotgun wedding –
A case of wife or death

A man needs a mistress
just to break the monogamy
A hangover is the
wrath of grapes

Does the name Pavlov
ring a bell?

Condoms should be
used on every conceivable occasion
Reading while sunbathing
makes you well red

When two egotists
meet, it's an I for an I
A bicycle can't stand
on its own because it is two tired
What's the definition
of a will? It's a dead give away
In democracy your
vote counts. In feudalism your count votes
She was engaged to
a boy with a wooden leg but broke it of

A chicken crossing
the road is poultry in motion
The man who fell into
an upholstery machine is fully recovered
You feel stuck with
your debt if you can't budge it
Local Area Network
in Australia – the LAN down under
Every calendar's days
are numbered
A lot of money is
tainted – Taint yours and taint mine
A boiled egg in the
morning is hard to beat

He had a photographic
memory that was never developed
A midget fortune-teller
who escapes from prison is a small medium at large
Once you've seen one
shopping center, you've seen a mall
Bakers trade bread
recipes on a knead-to-know basis
Acupuncture is a jab
well done.

Emergency
Number Sent in by Mike of New York
Advice for all new
Muslim Jihadi immigrants :
If you are trapped in a burning house or have been seriously injured and
are bleeding to death, the new emergency number is:-
08463871208666581209387153761008665131245408547352706745869912332416
57490768554109283657389999566322084638712086665812093871537610086651
31245408547352706745869912332416574907685541092836573899995663223899
99566322084638712086665812093871537610086651312454085473527067458699
12332416574907685541092836573899995663224735270674586991233241657490
76855410928365738999956632238999956630846387120866658120938715376100
86651312454085473527067458699123324165749076855410928365738999956632
20846387120866658120938715376100866513124540854735270674586991233241
65749076855410928365738999956632238999956632208463871208666581209387
15376100866513124540854735270674586991233241657490768554109283657389
99956632247352706745869912332416574907685541092836573899995663223899
99566308463871208666581209387153761008665131245408547352706745869912
33241657490768554109283657389999566322084638712086665812093871537610
08665131245408547352706745869912332416574907685541092836573899995663
22389999566322084638712086665812093871537610086651312454085473527067
45869912332416574907685541092836573899995663224735270674586991233241
65749076855410928365738999956632238999956630846387120866658120938715
37610086651312454085473527067458699123324165749076855410928365738999
95663220846387120866658120938715376100866513124540854735270674586991
23324165749076855410928365738999956632238999956632208463871208666581

Your call is important
to us ... Thank You For Your Patience.
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