"I'm
Fine" Contributed by Tom of Pasadena, CA
A farmer named Heather
had a tractor accident. In court, the trucking company's fancy hot shot
lawyer, was questioning Heather.

"Didn't
you say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine?'"
asked the lawyer.
Heather responded,
"Well, I'll tell you what happened. I had
just loaded my favorite cow, Bessie, into the..."

"I didn't
ask for any details,"
the lawyer interrupted. "Just answer the question, ... please.
Did you, or did you not say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine!'?"
Heather said,
"Well, I had just got Bessie into the trailer behind the tractor
and I was driving down the road...."
The lawyer interrupted
again and said, "Your Honor, I am trying to establish the fact
that, at the scene of the accident, this woman told the Highway Patrolman
on the scene that she was just fine. Now several weeks after the accident
she is trying to sue my client. I believe she is a fraud. Please tell
her to simply answer the question.
By this time, the
Judge was fairly interested in Heather's answer and said to the lawyer,
"I'd like to hear what he has to say about her favorite cow, Bessie."

Heather thanked the
Judge and proceeded. "Well, as I was saying,
I had just loaded Bessie, my favorite cow, into the trailer and was driving
her down the highway when this huge semi-truck and trailer ran the stop
sign and smacked my John Deer Tractor right in the side. I was thrown
into one ditch and Bessie was thrown into the other. I was hurting, real
bad and didn't want to move. However, I could hear old Bessie moaning
and groaning. I knew she was in terrible shape just by her groans."

"Shortly
after the accident a Highway Patrolman came on the scene. She could hear
Bessie moaning and groaning, so he went over to her. After he looked at
her, and saw her fatal condition, he took out his gun and shot her between
the eyes. Then the Patrolman came across the road, gun still in hand,
looked at me, and said,
"How are you feeling?"

"Now tell
me, what
the heck would you say?"
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