school

Answers by Failed Students

Favorite Animal

Some people can't handle the truth.

Our teacher asked what my favorite animal was, and I said, "Fried chicken."

Why We Love Kids

A little girl asked her mother, "Can I go outside and play with the boys?"
Her mother replied, "No, you can't play with the boys, they're too rough."

Chicken Roadkill

A man was riding his sportscar past a friend's chicken farm and he ran over one of the chickens and killed it.
When he got off the car, and looked at the chicken he recognized that this was his friend's prized chickens.

Tyrone

None of his classmates liked him cause of his stupidity, especially his teacher, who was always yelling at him, "You’re driving me insane, Tyrone!"

Thanksgiving Special

Their three kids, all successful, agreed to a Sunday dinner in their honor.
"Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad," gushed Son No. 1. "Sorry I'm running late. I had an emergency at the hospital with a patient, you know how it is, and I didn't have time to get you a gift."

One More Chance

Bubba got a football scholarship at Dimwit College. He was a good running back but a poor student.
At graduation day, Bubba didn't have enough credits.

Cantaloupes and Algebra

(I don't usually use other artist's works but I had to make an exception with this one from the great Charles Schultz --- Raoul)

Spoiling the Scotsman's Wife

My good lady and I walked past a swanky new restaurant last night.
"Did you smell that food?" she said, "it smelt incredible!"

Winter Boots

(Anyone who has ever dressed a child will love this) Did you hear about the teacher who was helping one of her pupils put on his boots?

He asked for help and she could see why.

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